Note: The following letter came to us on the Internet shortly after the New York/Washington attacks. It chronicles the events of September 11 for one of the surviving members of FDNY Haz-Mat 1 & Squad 288, Phil McArdle

Letter from Ground Zero

9/22/2001 5:17 PM

To Whom It May Concern:

I am sorry I have to write a letter: this way, being impersonal and general in nature (my time is being concentrated on survivors and the victims families).

I will do the best I can at trying to bring all of you up to date on the circumstances surrounding the tragic events of the World Trade Center from my perspective about FDNY Haz-Mat 1 & Squad 288.

My day started off pretty routinely, getting relieved early so I could go to a meeting about training issues with the Chief of Haz-Mat Operations BC Jack Fanning. Before going to meet Jack, I went to meet my wife Eileen. She was working in the City at a school in the Bronx and had brought some material from home that I intended to show Jack. I was running behind and about 15 minutes late to meet Jack. Little did I know at the time, that both John Hohmann (who relieved me early) and Jack Fanning (by rushing out of the office) had both spared my life; they are both still missing at the World Trade Center.

When I had gotten to Jack's office, Jeff Borkowski had already been in contact with Jack. Jack wanted both Jeff and myself to come down to the trade center. We loaded up a Suburban with some extrication devices and some SCBA and off we went.

We went down the FDR Drive and when we got on the FDR from upper Manhattan, we saw the second plane hit Tower two of the Trade Center. Continuing south on the FDR we went through the tunnel under Battery Park and came up on West Street on the south side of Tower 2. As Jeff and I looked north on West Street we could (see) a large number of civilians and emergency workers running towards us. For a brief moment we were slightly confused; why were emergency workers running away? In no time at all we quickly realized what was happening, Tower #2 was collapsing and everyone was trying to avoid the collapse zone. The debris from the collapse quickly overtook our vehicle and although we had just parked the vehicle we could hear the sounds of people running into ours, as well as other vehicles because of zero visibility. We donned breathing apparatus and proceeded into the trade center area. Along the way we gave some fresh air from our SCBA to people who were having difficulty breathing directing them to head south on West Street to safety. We continued to proceed north into the collapse area where we came upon a photographer with an obvious broken leg lying on the ground. He was in great pain and did not want to be moved. He was under the walkway that crossed West Street from the Trade Center to the World Financial Center. Fearing for his safety we moved him farther west from the collapse area to the inside of a deli located in a building away from West Street. Returning back to the same area where we just removed the photographer, we (were) now going to proceed back to the rubble to search. We began searching just as Tower #1 started to come down. We ran for cover in one of the buildings directly across the street at the World Financial Center, diving through a window and hiding behind one of the columns in the building. I could feel the pressure and the debris rushing past me as I hugged the column. Momentarily it because difficult to breathe, I started to put my facepiece on. The heat was pretty intense. I stayed near the column until most of the noise stopped; everything went black. After a few minutes we crawled out of the back of the building to safety.

At this point it was utter chaos trying to find people and get organized. It took a while to re-organize and find some people and get working on the rubble to look for survivors. A total recall was ordered and upon the arrival of a few more Haz-Mat guys we performed quick surveys of the perimeter in two teams of four checking for radiation, nerve and blister agent, all results were negative. We then began digging for survivors. Sometime after midnight I came off the rubble pile and was treated by EMS for debris in my left eye. I was treated at the scene and at Elmhurst Hospital over the next two days and regained vision in my left eye. I have been back to the incident a number of times but the main focus for me and the guys in the firehouse, is dividing our time between the work at the site and working with the families.

All of us at one time or another have asked ourselves, what would we want the guys to do for our families if something happened to us. Under usual circumstances when a death occurs, the Department and the Firefighters Unions (UFA & UFOA) provide a great deal of support to help the family of the deceased and the company to which he was assigned. Because of the extraordinary carnage and the number of missing, the Department and Union resources are virtually non-existent. We have had to endure most of the burden of taking care of the families and ourselves. This is what we have done so far.

We have essentially lost half of our operating personnel. While other special units have been taken out of service, Haz-Mat 1 has continued to operate both down at the site and in the firehouse. We are continuing to keep both the Squad and the Haz-Mat families up to date on what little information is being provided. We have been trying to secure outside counseling service for the wives, the children of the missing members, other family members and the guys in the firehouse. Our daily routine consists of sending personnel down to the rubble pile to dig and taking care of the 19 families with virtually no time off

Being one of the hardest hit firehouses is especially painful; we have 19 missing. We are not getting ready for the long process of funerals and memorial services. As of the writing of the letter only one of our members has been found. We will bury Lt. John Crisci on Friday of this week. The rescue operation may not go on much longer.

Many have asked what can be done to help us. The simplest answer I can give you is this. PLEASE, Please do not call or write at this time, we are too busy to reply. We sincerely appreciate your concern. The time I am spending talking or replying to E-mails and people on the phone is cutting into the time we need to spend with and supporting families. You all have been so sincere and kind, it sometimes becomes difficult to talk or write back. As I (am) writing or talking to some of you, I (am) beginning to cry for my friends lost, whom I will never see again. I don't want your calling or writing to make me crack. I have to be strong to try and keep the guys together in the Firehouse. ..

One last thing, many of you have asked about donations with this email is a flyer that you can duplicate. The money is being put into the local bank. All of the money given to this fund is going to the victim's families from Haz-Mat and Squad 288. We sincerely appreciate your concern and thank you for the many kind words you have offered.

May God Bless us all
Regards
Phil McArdle
FDNY Haz-Mat 1

Note - Donations to the families of Squad 288 & Haz-Mat 1 can be made to the Firefighters World Trade Center Fund, 56-29 68th St., Maspeth, NY 11378

19 brothers of Squad 288 & HazMat are missing and dead from the World Trade Center

Squad 288: Firefighter Peter Brennan, Firefighter Ronnie Gies, Firefighter Joseph Hunter, Firefighter Johnathan Ielpi, Lieutenant Ronald Kerwin, Firefighter Adam Rand, Firefighter Brian Sweeney, Firefighter Timothy Welty

HazMat: Firefighter Dennis Carey, Lieutenant John Crisci, Firefighter Martin Demeo, Batallion Chief John Fanning, Firefighter Thomas Gardner, Firefighter John Giordano, Firefighter Jonathan Hohmann, Captain Thomas Moody, Firefighter Dennis Scauso, Firefighter Kevin Smith, Captain Pat Waters